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Owner Of A Lonely Heart?
The age-old Lonely Hearts Column has been re-invented in the guise of Internet matchmaking dating agencies. They have been around for a while in the US and now their popularity is growing substantially in Britain, Germany and France.
Once, it was considered bad form, not to say a sign of desperation or mental illness, to look for a mate by means of a newspaper advertisement. The human equivalent of the want ads.
The classic male version was: International millionaire seeks well-rounded blonde early-twenties with cooking skills. Clay pigeon shooting an option. Trouble makers need not apply. The classic female version was: Mature lady with attractive figure seeks gentleman with property and off shore assets non smoker vegetarian. Cat lover an option. With view to marriage.
What was a stigma in the past has become an open web on-line chat room today. According to (unverifiable) `industry´ statistics, over 80 per cent of Britain's Internet users have visited a `dating site´ at least once. (Sounds a bit exaggerated but who knows what goes on during a lap-top session behind bedroom doors ?)
A more reliable information source is `comScore` . This survey organization says the most popular dating website in the UK in August 2008 (latest figure) was MeetIC, with 716,000 members. Number three was Plentyoffish.co.uk with 647,000 members.
A new company on the UK meet-market is eHarmony, based in Pasadena, California, offering matchmaking through science. The logisticians at eHarmony work in connection with the Oxford Internet Institute, part of the University of Oxford. Their trick is `psychometric tests` converted to `algorithms`. (An algorithm is a rule for solving a mathematical problem in a finite number of steps). The firm eHarmony claims to have 20 million members worldwide. They charge 33.95 British Pounds for one month`s membership.
There is an ancient, very ancient, alternative: Chinese astrology. All you have to do is go to a soothsayer in Chinatown (a practitioner of Mandarin or Manchu origin is preferred) and get the goods. If you are of the sign of the Pig (the next occurrence in 2019) the counsel is to marry a gentlewoman who is of the sign of the Rabbit. If you are designated as a Rabbit (next occurrence 2011) marry a gentleman who is a Pig.
In any case, if you chance to find the spouse of your dreams it could be an idea to remember this joke. Two men are at a bar. The first one asks, `If you could have anything you wanted what would it be ?`. The second man replies, `I`d like to be in love`. The first man responds, `Me too. But don`t tell my wife`.
