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Three's A Crowd
Britain is trying to squeeze into the EU's most exclusive club: The Franco-German axis.
Eursoc reported last week that Britain, France and Germany plan to meet before the next EU summit in March in order to hammer out a united front for the negotiations.
More details of the Big Three's plans have emerged today, however. The Telegraph reports that Britain's prime minister and foreign secretary want to have trilateral meetings with their French and German counterparts every six weeks.
The newspaper reports that Tony Blair is sceptical about the possibilities for serious debate in the EU when membership increases from 15 to 25 this May. He reckons that working with smaller, like minded groups of nations will be the only way to do business in future.
France and Germany feel the same way, as their behaviour in the last twelve months has proved beyond debate. The trouble is, when France and Germany get together, their decisions have a great effect on the rest of the EU, whether the other countries like it or not.
France and Germany stitched up the rest of the union by agreeing to block reform of the Common Agricultural Policy. They conspired to bring down the cornerstone of Eurozone economic policy, the stability pact. They presented a united front against president Bush's planned war in Iraq, and seemed to believe that they spoke for the rest of Europe by siding against America.
President Chirac's fury when a majority of the EU's smaller nations supported Bush's policy gave EURSOC one of its quotes of the year: "They missed a good opportunity to shut up."
After the constitutional talks collapsed in December, Chirac and Germany's chancellor Gerhard Schröder were expected to declare their intention to found a 'fast-track' EU, more dedicated to European principles than those nations which dared to disagree with their betters.
The fact that the French and the Germans break more EU regulations than any other countries was conveniently overlooked - after all, in the fast-track EU (read France, Germany and a handful of willing 'satellite nations') the French and Germans would write their own laws.
Blair desperately wants into this club. Despite Britain's de facto leadership of 'New Europe', the PM realises that that the Franco-German axis is the EU's real engine.
To ingratiate himself with Schröder and Chirac (who he had a major falling out with in early 2003) Blair gave them the green light to create the beginnings of an EU defence force independent of NATO. Blair claims that the tiny independent headquarters the French and Germans demanded will not grow to undermine NATO's position as Europe's defence guarantee: He is the only person who believes this.
The French, for their part, appear to be delighted that Blair wants to join. France has been worried for some time about the possibility of the EU's smaller nations conspiring to dilute its power - with Britain on board, the Franco-German-British axis will be able to do pretty much as it pleases.
Questions remain as to what the three will actually be able to decide: Liberal, Atlanticist Britain and socialist, anti-American France don't appear to have much in common. France uses Germany to add weight to its attempts to undermine America. Will Blair allow this scheming to continue, or does he really believe he will be able to prevent France pursuing its agenda?
Britain would be foolish to put too much faith in the French, whose leadership over the decades would shock the worst cynic. If the PM thinks that France will allow Britain to get in the way of what it sees as its destiny, Blair must be truly deranged.
Perhaps, though, the sheer range of views represented will give the trio's attempts to force changes through the EU more credibility - France and Germany's joint efforts always appeared narrowly self-interested.
Nevertheless, it is very difficult to imagine Britain becoming a paid-up member of the Gruesome Twosome (or Three Stooges, as we must call them), whether through invitation or desire.
