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Leave Your Beach Towels At Home
US readers might not be aware of this, but throughout Europe, German tourists are notorious for hogging the best spots by the pool by draping their towels over sunloungers. While their British cousins are deep in binge drinking-inspired slumber, Germans sneak from their hotel rooms in the early hours and bag poolside sunloungers with their towels. Blearly-eyed Brits emerge to find the best spots already taken, while the Germans rise later, claiming their places while the Brits smoulder resentfully on the rickety chairs.
It's a long tradition between British and German tourists which pays little attention to the joys of European Unity. Some angry Brits have been known to dump German towels in the pool if their owners are not there: A couple of years ago, a tour guide landed in hot water for setting fire to German beach towels in an attempt to "liberate" the sunbeds.
A couple of years ago, a German lawyer informed his countrymen that Brits were well within their rights to remove towels draped over unoccupied sunloungers. Only hired chairs could be annexed, he claimed. This doesn't seem to have stopped the practice.
This year, though, things could change. Germans are being encouraged to fly less and explore the joys of their own country rather than head south (with attendant environmental damage). Germany is a vast and rather beautiful country - perhaps its citizens could soon discover the joys of the Rhine, the Bodensee and Bavaria for themselves, rather than baking by a Spanish pool surrounded by grumbling Brits.
Red-faced Brits could find themselves facing half-empty hotels and unoccupied sunloungers... but then what would they complain about?
